I was visiting family in Connecticut recently when I happened to be driving about town looking for the local grocery store. Stopped at a red light, I looked to my right at the car waiting next to me. The man in the driver’s seat looked like a nut case! He was enthusiastically beating a rhythm on his steering wheel, bouncing from side to side in the seat with his head thrown slightly back and his mouth wide open.

A nut case! Or was he? He could hear the music – I couldn’t.

When we are faced with clients who seem to make bad choices regarding their pets or co-workers who seem to be getting on our last nerve, it might be a good idea to remember that we can’t hear the music of their lives. Their music may be filled with the dour sounds of financial stress, the decrescendo of the imminent breakup of a marriage, the deep fearful chords of losing their pet, or... Well, you get the idea.

Rather than reacting to others based on our own music, it would be more effective to remember we can’t hear their music, and cut them a little slack. We just might be the only light, uplifting notes they hear that day.

A farmer was spreading manure on his fields one day. He didn’t realize he had some manure on his finger when he picked his nose. When he made it home to his family, he complained “This house smells like crap.” He went over to the neighborhood bar for a beer and commented to his friends that the bar smelled like crap. The problem wasn’t where he was. He was the problem carrying the crap with him ever where he went.

I first heard this story from author Christopher James Brady.

If you keep running into the same problems – poor relationships, bad luck, no one at work likes you, can’t get a promotion, always broke - you might want to check for some crap on your finger. Take responsibility for your life. No one else can or will.

People tell me they don’t have time to improve their situations be it through reading, taking a class, joining a gym, going back to school, etc. And, yet, they have plenty of time to watch the Super Bowl, watch television, play on the local bowling league, party, etc. What they are really saying is that changing the situation isn’t a priority. They are comfortable in their misery. Even the princess finally got off the mattress with the pea! Why not you?

Most people live on “don’t wants” rather than doing what needs to be done to succeed.

Don’t be “most people.”

Here are some thoughts that have helped me:

• No one has reached a point where they don’t need to grow anymore. No one.
• You choose whether or not you succeed. No one else. Your greatest asset is yourself. By the same token, your greatest challenge is yourself.
• If the information in your brain is accurate, you can make better decisions. Seems to me it is pretty important to know what information you have stored in your brain.
• Those who understand people, care about people, and communicate well with people make great contributions in their chosen field or endeavor.
• Make a decision and then manage the decision.
• Anything worth doing is worth doing poorly until you get good at it.
• Success creates options.
• It may appear easier to fit in with the crowd, but then you have a lifetime of average. Nothing wrong with average, but you are meant for greater things.
• We have tons of inputs every day, positive and negative. The trick is to increase the positive and eliminate the negative. You might also want to make sure you are a source of negative.
• Every thought you have does not need to come out your mouth.
• Change what you need to change to get where you want to go.
• If you want to succeed, you must focus on the goal and what it takes to get there. Focus on solutions not circumstances.
• Accept responsibility.
• Plan your work and work your plan.
• Outwork everybody.
• No one has ever been successful completely on their own. It always takes the help of others. There will be others along the way that will play a role in your success – just as you hope to play a role in the success of others.

I spent this weekend attending a Leadership Conference and had a blast. Here are some of my favorite quotes from the speakers. Unfortunately, I can’t remember who said a few of them – sorry!

• You either hate losing bad enough to change or you hate changing bad enough to lose…you decide!
• Leaders must decide what matters before they can live a life that matters.
• Don’t just go through life. Grow through life!

Orrin Woodward author and leadership coach

• The change you are resisting is the door to your destiny.
• We might not have it all together, but together we have it all.
• Little changes over time make big differences.
• A life without a dream becomes a senseless routine.

Felmar C. Montenegro leadership coach

• We are all born equal with the opportunity to become un-equal through rolling up our sleeves and working on ourselves.
• Your calendar reveals your priorities.
• You only grow when you are uncomfortable.
• Focus on growing yourself. The better you become, the better quality of people you will attract.
• So many people are too busy being what others want them to be.

Chris Brady author and leadership coach

• Be careful because there are people who will duplicate what you say and do.
• On your deathbed, what others think of you is far from your mind.
• You are writing the chapters in your life.
• The best way to have joy is to give joy.

George Guzzardo blogger and leadership coach

• Learning is an active process.
• You can’t negotiate the price of success.
• Habits have consequences.
• Habits are like rabbits. Be careful which ones you pick because they are going to duplicate all over.

“Tenacious” is the 17^th characteristic in John C. Maxwell’s book “The 17 Essential Qualities of a Team Player”. Tenacity is not something common, but is required to be successful in anything.

Why isn’t tenacity more common? Let me ask you to do a little thing. Sit in a chair with your feet firmly on the ground. Raise both of your arms as high over your head as you can. Now, raise them a little further. Why didn’t you raise them this high when first asked to raise your arms as high as you can? Most of the time, people don’t give all they can simply because they think it will require more than they are capable.

Giving all you can is just that. No more, no less. Not impossible. Tenacity is doing whatever it takes even when not convenient or easy. There are many who claim to be team players, but the real proof is when personal effort is required. Those who are committed to the team and its mission are tenacious. Their commitment is not conditional.

As a group, the team will experience challenges and obstacles. This is not unexpected. Tenacity doesn’t mean you aren’t going to experience fatigue or frustration. It does mean that you refuse to give up or let up! Agree as a team that when facing challenges, only one of you will “take a break” – emotional or physical – at a time. You will be amazed at how quickly this commitment strengthens the team overall. Maxwell put it very succinctly when he wrote “…trying times are no time to quit trying”.

Maxwell suggests three steps to improve your tenacity.

Each time someone exhibits tenacity, it becomes easier. Stretch your will and commit to following through with tenacity even in the face of challenge or inconvenience. Reward tenacity in others. Become a team known for never giving up!

In John C. Maxwell’s book “The 17 Essential Qualities of a Team Player”, the 16^th quality is “Solution-Oriented”. Definitely an attribute many veterinary technicians can relate to on a daily basis. Our profession requires ingenuity because there aren’t black and white answers to much of what we do. The veterinary technician profession has progressed over the decades in good part due to the fact that we have to invent as we go. We can’t afford to wait for someone else to come up with solutions to our daily patient care challenges. We have to come up with them on our own and we do so willingly.

When it comes to our work with the animals, we accept an attitude of “can-do” as our norm. Need to support a 1600lb horse as it recovers from a broken leg? Design and fabricate a sling frame. Tired of llama spit? Hang a hand towel on the nose piece of the llama’s halter. Need a way to safely turn a 150 lb dog recovering from spinal surgery? Design and fabricate a sling system combined with a electric lift. Working with feral cats? Cleaning the cages becomes simple and safe using a custom-built Plexiglas drop box. Technicians are always solving problems using ingenuity, experience and common sense.

There are more than enough people running around pointing out what is wrong. Anybody can point out problems. “It can’t be done” and “oh woe is me” are about as valuable as a nail in the bottom of your foot. Don’t tell your team it can’t be done. You are smarter than that. Find a way!!! Team members who are solution-oriented choose a more constructive perspective and see opportunities rather than obstacles.

John C. Maxwell reminds us there are four things necessary to help you become more solution-oriented.

Did you notice that all four are related to attitude or mindset? Do you have the attitude of a solution-oriented team player?

In John C. Maxwell’s book “The 17 Essential Qualities of a Team Player”, the 15^th quality is “selfless”. To put the interest of others first is the hallmark of a team player. It isn’t “all about me” when you are truly part of a team.

Being selfless doesn’t mean you are a doormat or a sucker. It does require placing the best interest of the team ahead of your personal agenda. This promotes team success which, in fact, is your success also! Nothing great was ever achieved by a single person. Nothing!

“Yeah, but I have an opinion about everything. I am smarter than just about everyone on the team, so I should be heard. I should get credit for my brains and contribution. I should have my name listed in the credits on that journal article. Hey, the idea for the research was mine to begin with! Shouldn’t I get the credit?” There is a time and place for taking credit and it is a less frequent than anyone imagines! You will be amazed at how much credit you are given if you routinely give credit away.

John C. Maxwell’s suggestions for developing a selfless attitude are to be generous, avoid internal politics and display loyalty. What do each of these look like in the veterinary setting?

Be generous with your time, thoughts, and words throughout your day. Give willingly and without resentment. When someone is busy, try to pitch in and pick up part of their workload even when you think you are just as busy. Doing one small task takes some of the pressure off the other person. Think about your teammates and what they need. How about a smile or a kind word? Maybe surprise everyone by bringing donuts in. Little things are all it takes to show people you are thinking of them. Don’t forget kind or supportive words. Encourage and compliment with sincerity.

Avoid internal politics – they are incredibly selfish. Politics are all about what “I want” rather than what is best for the team. By the way, gossip is part of internal politics. Make a point of avoiding internal politics by avoiding those who are involved. When you can’t avoid them, make an effort to turn such conversations around. Before participating in a conversation, ask yourself “is this helping or hindering the team?”

Display loyalty even when you may take some heat for it. Be loyal in your words and actions even when no one is looking. Be loyal, not defensive. If someone from another group shares negative about one of your team, be loyal enough to stop the conversation in a polite but firm manner. If someone is bashing your entire team, politely ask them not to do so in front of you and remind them that you don’t ever bash their team! If a client is frustrated or angry with a member of your team, point out that you are surprised by the client’s concern as you know Mary to be a talented compassionate technician and you will look into the their concern right away.

Maxwell also suggests there are ways to become more selfless.

Promote someone else

Never talk about your own accomplishments. I say never because this is a good place to start. Humility is an acquired trait so it requires practice. Be humble. Shine a light on other people. Brag to clients and staff about others on the team and leave out your contribution. “It is amazing what you can accomplish if you do not care who gets the credit.” Harry Truman

Take a subordinate role

This is easy to do if you pay attention to what is best for the team. It could be something as simple as you restrain the patient and let someone else place the IV catheter. Or let someone else assist in the surgery and you clean up afterward. Simple actions, but they build your humility and help others take the lead.

Give secretly

Look for opportunities to give secretly. This is downright fun! Complete someone’s assignment when they are elsewhere:

• cleaning up the OR;
• hanging a new bag of fluids on someone else’s patient;
• taking out the trash;
• restocking a room;
• organize a work space;
• submitting lab samples;
• completing treatment sheets;
• checking inventory for expiration dates

Do it without being asked and without expecting anything in return.

We could all practice being selfless a little more frequently. OK, some of us need more practice than others!

The 14^th quality of a Team Player according to John C. Maxwell in the book “The 17 Qualities of a Team Player” is “self improving”. Those two little words describe a powerful and rather rare characteristic. Most people are focused on “doing” rather than growing. They don’t believe self improvement is a priority so they don’t believe they have the time to read, learn and grow. And, yet, the most valuable team players are those who are hungry to learn. A growing team is a learning team. A learning team is a successful team. A successful team creates the opportunity for a thriving business.

Change is inevitable. Our clients change. The veterinary market changes. The economy changes. Our vendor relationships change. Veterinary science changes. Absolutely everything around us is in a constant state of change. If we aren’t deliberately growing and changing ourselves, we and our team will not be prepared to take advantage of opportunities that come our way nor will we be prepared to face obstacles.

Team members who make self improvement a priority make a huge contribution to the team. They learn about people, communication, veterinary science, challenges, market issues, economy, history, self, etc. It is not necessary to become an expert in all areas, but you do need to stretch your brain and your capacity every day. Self improvement for your profession will also influence your personal life and visa versa. Work on both areas because it is not enough to only develop your professional mind. Learning is a staple food in the mental diet. Evolve your mind!

Remember though, it is not enough to just study. Applying what you learn is as important as the studying itself. “Self development” assumes you are taking action by applying the lessons. This implies there will be mistakes, struggles and victories. If you aren’t making mistakes, you aren’t doing anything to stretch yourself and grow. And, you aren’t much use to your team if you aren’t growing.

John C. Maxwell specifies three processes required to improve yourself.

1. Preparation: What you are doing is more important than what you are planning to do. Let me illustrate this with a short story.
   
   Three birds are sitting on a telephone wire. One says “I am going to fly away now.” How many birds are sitting on the wire? Three – because not one has taken any action as yet.
   
   Focus on what you can intentionally improve today, not just in the future. Vague plans or ideas will not gain you self improvement. Plans plus action will! Take action every day.
2. Contemplation: Stop and think. Assess yourself daily. What are the lessons you learned that day? What could you have done or said differently? What did you do or say that indicates growth on your part?
   
   This assessment does not need to be a long drawn out process. Even 15 minutes might be enough time. This is not meant to be time spent beating yourself up or planning your to do list. This is time to contemplate your day’s decisions, actions and results.
3. Application: All the planning and studying will not amount to anything if you don’t apply what you have learned. Take action even if you don’t think you are ready. The game plan is to “Aim. Fire!” not Aim, Aim, Aim, Aim….

Self improvement is self directed education with a purpose. Remember that the enemy of great is good. Mediocrity is a dangerous place to rest. Grow yourself!